Snake Dogg Blogg

Day 11

Less than a week and a half to go.  Crazy.

This lady over here named Mary is leaving on Monday.  She's been like my surrogate Iraqi mother.  She reminds me of 2 of my favorite aunts (Kay and Clara Marie for those who know).  You can tell she was a 'head back in the sixties, but somehow she has maintained a pure heart and some innocence.  She's an incredible listener, and good for my self esteem.  I"m going to miss her.  Anyway, last night we were talking and I realized something.

Every single worldly possession of mine is sitting in 4 3' X 2' containers in my parents' garage.  Two Tupperware storage boxes, a suitcase, and a military trunk contain everything I own.  I have no bed, no car, no home, and no furniture of any kind.

Imagine that on October 8th, 2005 I got into a really bad car wreck and went into a coma.  For a year and a half I slept, having dreams of world travel and nightmares of Iraq.  While I was asleep my girlfriend left me, my family got rid of everything of mine that didn't have sentimental value, and for the most part, I was left alone.  A few of those close to me stopped by the hospital regularly to check in on me, but other than that, I wasn't a part of anyone's every day life.  Then suddenly on May 31st, 2007, I woke up.  Sitting on my lap was a briefcase full of money.

That's pretty much what I"m coming home to.  For better or worse, I'm coming home to a completely clean slate.  I'm a 27 year old newborn.  No one cares what I do with my time.  No one is depending on me for anything.  I don't owe anyone anything.  It's a strange feeling.

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Astros win!  Wandy!  If I were Garner, this would be my lineup:

1. Biggio 2B
2. Loretta SS
3. Berkman LF
4. Lee RF
5. Ensberg 3B
6. Pence CF
7. Lamb 1B
8. Ausmus C

That leaves Burke as your utility player and Luke Scott as your primary DH.  Lane and Everett go on the block for a closer or young catching prospects.

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For Billy.  All in good fun though.

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I think I'd really dig a Dale Watson cover of this one.  Scootin a boot at the Spoke to this would be the shizzle.

Day 12

Not trying to get too specific on what kind of girl I want to settle down with upon my return home, but this girl would probably fit the bill:

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Save for the fact that she's only 18 years old, she's perfect.  A smart, beautiful, olympic-level pole vaulter from SoCal.

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I had a dream last night that Little Jerry WIlson landed on my thigh and scooted a long, runny, fly turd all down my leg.  Weird.

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Astros win!  Roy O.!

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I"m seriously considering going to an all guayabera wardrobe.  They fucking rule.

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The Old 97's recently released "Best Of" album is a farce.  No Old 97's compilation is complete without "Big Brown Eyes", "Streets Of Where I'm From", and "Mama Tried".

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Seriously, is that chick up there not fucking beautiful?

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I used to think the chorus of this song was "One Guayabera".  Another shattered dream.

Day 13

Today started out great.  This morning I watched the new episode of Entourage (which fucking ruled, I take back what I said about Vince's new agent, she is fucking HOT), and surfed the internet.  Then I went and worked out, which was cool.  I had a pretty good salad at the DFAC for lunch.  When I got back from lunch I had a new email from the ferry company in Greece telling me that they couldn't mail my ferry tickets to an APO address.  This fucking sucks.  I don't know why they can't just have the fucking tickets waiting for me at the dock. 

The more time I spend living overseas and travelling abroad, the more I realize that the one area that the U.S. is actually head and shoulders above most of the rest of the world is customer service.  We just know how things should be done.

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Raptors win.  Both their PG's got hurt, so they are F'ed for Game 6.  Barring a miracle, their season will end tomorrow night.

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Astros lose.  Roger Clemens will probably not pitch for the Astros this year.  You know what (and it pains me to say this), I'm starting to really sour on the Rocket.  I understand wanting to win, but fuck man, it's a team game.  You're either loyal or you aren't.

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It's really starting to warm up over here.  I  think we reached triple digits today.  I"m glad I'm getting out of here before it really kicks off.

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Ok, I gotta go, I have a new episode of Heroes to watch.

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In honor of Smitty, who continues to predict that my life once I get back home will closely resemble Lane Staley's last days:

Day 14

Two weeks.  Unbelievable.  I mean, not this coming Tuesday, but next Tuesday, I'll be flying out of Iraq for the last time ever.  Crazy.

Today I dropped off my last load of laundry ever.  One thing I may actually miss about this place is that everything is taken care of for you.  Gas is always in the car, your laundry gets washed and folded for you (for free), your meals are cooked and are free, all your bills are paid, and everything is within walking distance.  Aside from being in a war zone 10,000 miles from home and working 80+ hours per week, it's a pretty simple life.

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I watched my DVD of the 2005 National Championship game.  It still gives me goosebumps.  VY is unreal.  One thing that surprised me this time through was how many things went Texas' way.  We got several calls that could have gone either way and several bounces of the ball that would have F'ed us had they gone differently.  Still, we deserved the win.

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I'm pretty stoked to see the summer blockbusters in the theaters this summer.  It's been over a year since I saw a movie in a real theater.  Hopefully Spiderman 3 will be good; that's probably the first one I'll see.

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Dude, how fucking good is that 1st Bud Light on Sunday Beach gonna taste?  Holy shit.  I know, man.

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I had a fucked up dream involving my ex-girlfriend last night, but the weirdest thing about it was that it had a soundtrack.  It was a Phil Collins song, but I couldn't remember it once I woke up.  I've been listening to Phil Collins songs for over an hour, and I think it was either Easy Lover or Invisible Touch.  Neither of those songs are ones I particularly like and neither had anything to do with my relationship with her, so I don't know wtf it was doing in my dream.

Anyway, this is for Ojo, who I'm sure will be busting a move in his office shortly.  Oonce...oonce...oonce...

Day 15

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So it's the last day in April.  Crazy.  18 months, gone.  Amazing.  I'll probably marvel at the passage of time for the rest of my life. 

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The Raptors are fucked.  Bosh didn't take control and they had no answer for Jason Kidd.  At least TJ has played well.

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'stros lose again.  Woody Williams was a bad signing.  Pence goes 2 for 4.  You know, looking at the next five years (players age 30 or younger), the 'stros should have a pretty strong lineup:

Position	Player	Current Age
OF	Carlos Lee	30
OF	Hunter Pence	24
OF	Luke Scott	28
1B	Josh Anderson*	24
2B	Chris Burke	27
SS	Adam Everett	30
3B	Mark Saccomanno*	27
C	Hu Quintero	27
SP	Roy Oswalt	30
SP	Jason Jennings	28
SP	Brandon Backe	29
SP	Chris Sampson	28
SP	Matt Albers	24
RP	Brad Lidge	30
RP	Chad Qualls	28
CL	Dan Wheeler	29
	*current minor leaguer

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I've heard that soldiers get a bit skittish when they're coming up on the end of their tour.  Now I know exactly how they feel.

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They were showing "A River Runs Through It" at the DFAC during lunch today.  That scene where Brad Pitt hooks that monster fish and follows it down the rapids is fucking money, and the main reason I wouldn't get mad at my girl for sleeping with Pitt if she had the chance.

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The 49ers got a steal in Tarell Brown in the 5th round.  Lyle Sendlein, Selvin Young, Ramonce Taylor, and Tully Janszen all went undrafted.  It'll be interesting to see if any of them get free agent deals.

The Cowboys douched the 2nd day of their draft.  I like the QB Isaiah Stanback in the 4th, but they really needed an inside linemen (OG/C), a 3rd cornerback, and backup defensive tackle, and didn't get any of them.  CB Tarell Brown, OG Josh Beekman, and DT Kareem Brown were all available when they picked OT Doug Free with their 2nd pick in the 4th.  Oh well.  Overall, their team for THIS year is no better after the draft than it was before, but they do have those 2 #1's next year.

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Day 16

My boss got back today.  Hopefully she'll be cool for the last 2 weeks here.

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Astros win.  Pence records first major league hit, Sampson gets win #3.  I think Berkman is out of the slump.  We should be on our way now.

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Can you say "shitfaced"?  I loved this.  "I wanna kisssh you." LOL!

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I spent almost 4 hours watching the draft on the internet (an excrutiating endeavor, I wouldn't recommend it), so most of today's post is about the draft.  The thing that sucks about watching it online is that you don't get to see the agony on the players' faces as they drop and drop and drop (see Brady Quinn).

Four Longhorns got drafted yesterday.  Mike Griffin and Aaron Ross went back to back in the first round (how was our secondary so horrible?).  Atlanta got a steal getting Blalock in the 2nd.  Tim Crowder went to Denver in the 2nd as well.  Today should see Tarell Brown and Brian Robison come off the board in the 4th, with Kasey Studdard, Selvin Young, Lyle Sendlein, and Tully Janszen all possibly going in the final couple of rounds.  That means anywhere from 7-10 players drafted.  Anytime a school puts double digit players in the draft in a single year, it's big time.  Fyi, so far there have been EIGHTEEN FIRST DAY picks from the 2005 Rose Bowl game.  There was an unreal amount of talent on the field for that game.

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Looking at next year, the Longhorns have 15 graduating Seniors.  Here are my current draft predictions for them:

1. DT Frank Okam- 2nd Round
2. WR Limas Sweed - 2nd Round
3. OT Tony Hills- 3rd Round
4. DT Derek Lokey- 5th Round
5. SS/LB Drew Kelson- 6th Round
6. FS Marcus Griffin- 6th Round
7. WR Billy Pittman - 6th Round
8. CB Erick Jackson- 7th Round
9. LB Scott Derry- Undrafted
10. WR Nate Jones - Undrafted
11. LB Robert Killebrew- Undrafted
12. C Dallas Griffin- Undrafted
13. DT Thomas Marshall- Undrafted
14. SS Tyrell Gatewood- Undrafted
15. CB Brandon Foster- Undrafted

That's 8 players drafted, but none in the first round, although with stellar seasons Sweed, Okam, and/or Hills could all move up.  These days, if you get a scholarship to Texas, and play all 4 years, you have a 50% chance of signing an NFL contract.  Pretty good success rate.

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Dallas traded back.  In the end, they basically got a top 5 pick next year for a 3rd and a 5th rounder this year.  Excellent trade.  The only thing that sucks is that they passed up players like Dwayne Jarrett, Sidney Rice, Robert Meachem, Alan Branch, and Brandon Meriweather to pick Anthony Spencer instead.  So, long term they helped themselves tremendously, but they didn't make this year's team much better at all.

A lot of good players are still left for today.  Plenty of Cornerbacks and Offensive Guards that I think will be good.  Whoever drafts Brian Robison and/or Tarell Brown is getting a steal.

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Yes, I know I have too much time on my hands.

p.s.: LJW is still alive, but he's been avoiding me.  I think he's pissed that I chalked him up as dead so prematurely.

Day 17

Mired in Cost Reports for the last time ever.  And as usual, the weekends over here continue to suck mossy 3-toed sloth balls.  Only 2 more weekends after this one, and I'll be partying like an '89 Axl Rose.

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My pet fly showed up again last night, so he's not dead as I assumed.  Something was different about him though.

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The Astros called up Hunter Pence and made him their starting CenterFielder, demoting Chris Burke to a utility role.  Can't argue the move considering both players' performance so far this year, but it may have been a mite too early imo.  We'll see. Maybe Pence will put up ROY numbers and spark the team.  I guess when you lose 7 in a row, something's got to change.  On a positive note, Lidge pitched another inning w/o giving up a run last night.  Baby steps.

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Raptors lose.  I said this after game 1, but if Bosh doesn't shoot over 50%, the Raptors will lose every time.  Looks like TJ had a good game, and Calderon sucked balls with 6 turnovers.  If they lose the next one, they're beat.

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The NFL draft is today.  I will be watching it online.  So far I've read a lot of interesting rumors.  The most  recent one has the Cowboys trading down and drafting Anthony Spencer, a DE/LB combo.  This would be a horrible move considering their needs and the dearth of top tier CB's and WR's in this year's draft.

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Day 18

2.5 weeks.  Crazy.  I'm going to try to make a long post today since I had 2 days off. 

Smitty and I were talking about perceptions of Iraq and reality, and we came to the conclusion that there is just simply no possible way to completely convey what life over here is like.  You can describe it at length, and the picture in someone's head will still be WAY off.  Until you get over here and sit in a DFAC surrounded by GI's, Aussie and Romanian soldiers, and TCN workers, until you hear a round make impact less than 60 yards from where you are sleeping, until you stare out into a beautiful dusty desert sunset, until you go to sleep to the sound of deisel generators, until you feel that ungodly heat, until you walk into a military weight room, or watch a movie in a giant tent, or hear the warbling siren, or see tanks, and bradleys, and duece and a halfs all driving by like so many Geo's on their morning commute, until you sit in a bunker straining to comprehend a garbled giant voice telling you whether or not you might make it through this shit and if it's over or not, or wear a ballistic helmet and vest for hours in desert summer heat, until you spend countless hours alone in a 10' X 12' metal container, until you befriend a fucking house fly, until you see soldiers come back from convoy covered in dust, dirty with who knows what scars and memories, until you haggle with an Iraqi over the price of pirated DVDs, until you stare at a computer monitor for 80+ hours a week, or play basketball on a slab of busted up concrete, or play monopoly in a giant sprung structure,... until you do all that, you just won't know what it's like.  But I guess a lot of experiences are like that.  That's what makes each person's life unique and cool.

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My boss will be back on Sunday, which means my holiday is probably over.  For the last 2 weeks, I've probably averaged around 30 minutes of actual work per day.  She has a tendency of creating work, so I figure she'll try to ride me hard these last 2 weeks.  Whatever, no sense in fighting and burning bridges this late in the game.  Sure has been nice having my own office though.

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Little Jerry Wilson is gone.  Last night he was nowhere to be seen.  The previous night, he acted so much like a pet that it was creeping me out.  He came and landed on my knee while I was playing guitar and just sat there.  I got out my camera and put it right up to him to take a few pictures (which came out all fucking blurred--goddam $350 fucking camera), and he didn't flinch.  He landed on my hand and crawled around like a pillbug, which is very unflylike.  Anyway, he's gone now.  Probably dead.  Bummer.  It probably wasn't all that healthy for me to be spending my lonely nights talking to a fly anyway.

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Astros lose 6th in a row.

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Can't wait to see TO's reaction when the Cowboys draft a WR with their first pick.

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In memory of LJW (Little Jerry Wilson; my friend, my fly):

Day 19

what happened 2 days ago?  I don't even remember.  April is absolutely evaporating.

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A very attractive 21 year old girl has started emailing me via MySpace.  I guess I should go ahead and decide if 6 years is too much of a gap for me...nah.  As long as she can buy her own beer, it's cool.

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Watched The War Tapes.  What it is: an accurate portrayal of the attitudes and experiences of combat soldiers.  What it ISN"T: an accurate portrayal of facts, an accurate portrayal of the average soldiers activities, and an accurate portrayal of the company I work for.  I'd be the first to admit that there is a lot of shady and wasteful shit going on (including my company), and I have absolutely ZERO loyalty to my current employer, but every single thing that was said about the company I work for, EVERY SINGLE THING, was a lie.

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Astros lose 5th in a row.

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I'm absolutely loving the idea of VY and Ted Ginn on the same team with Norm Chow as the OC.  VY = MJ of NFL, TG = Pippen.

Day 20

My OCD requires that I keep these posts in order, so I'm going back and posting something for the two I missed.

-Little Jerry is still alive and well.

-The TV show Jericho has a cool concept but is poorly done.

-Heroes still rules.

-Astros lose their 4th in a row, offensive woes officially become a concern.

-Raptors win to even series against NJ 1-1, finally get Bosh enough touches.